Bourne to die
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do u ever have a thought that’s so fuckin inappropriate that u feel like dumping a bucket of water on urself like. calm down, self. tone it down. think about jesus

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Date By Numbers  (via masturbationdestination)

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I am excited to see a generation of women who will raise their boys to be good rather than their girls to be scared.

that dick is not medicine


but i will take it daily 

(Source: awfulhappy, via hazyunicorns)





things that will always sound sarcastic

  • good for you
  • thanks a lot
  • yeah right
  • nice to know
  • wow
  • way to go
  • totally
  • ok buddy

Not if you say ‘man’ at the end

ok buddy man

I might not have thought that last one through

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starting today all blogs without the following images will be deleted within 24 hours



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does anybody else think tired and sleepy mean two totally different things

sleepy is cute and dozing off and happy but tired is 10 cups of coffee and murder

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If anxiety burned calories I’d be the skinniest bitch alive.

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(via theloveanddesireforgiraffes)

Drunk text me. Text me when the music is loud and there are girls dancing around you and you’re not quite coherent and you’re not quite yourself. Drunk text me that you love me or that you miss me or that I’m on your mind. Let the alcohol tell me all the things you won’t say sober.




Forever reblogging this.

And the fact that there’s more than one company means several people called makes it even better.

I am crying and will cry forever

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